- Who am I among the billions of God's children to have merited the attention of the very Creator of this world?
- What have I done to deserve the love of God in my life?
- Where was I when He first tried to get my attention? And what took me so long to finally hear Him?
- How did it happen that God took notice of me, the vilest of sinners, and showed mercy and grace?
- Why would He, the greatest of all, condescend to rescue a soul not just rebellious but as blind and stupid as mine?
I can't really trace the path that it took to get me from where I was to where I am today. All I know is that step by step, little bit by little bit, God has been leading me back to Him. He has shown such patience and mercy to me that I feel unworthy in asking for anything more.
I am in awe of my Savior who has taken my sins, my pains, my fears, and turned them into lessons on how to love more completely. I am filled with the deepest gratitude to know that Jesus came to this earth and suffered more than a human can bear just so that someone like me won't have to bear the full weight and pain of my mistakes.
I don't know who I am or what I did that made God take notice of me or my badly botched life. But I sure am glad that He did. He took me from the darkest depths of hell on earth and lifted me to see the light of His Son. He has brought me knowledge, comfort, joy and above all else He has brought me peace. Peace of mind, peace of heart and soul.
When I think back to who I was 5, 10, 15 or 20 years ago I am truly amazed at how far God has brought me. Each passing year has seen some improvement, some little bit of learning. He pushes me with love to become someone better than I am. No amount of native intelligence or inner courage has brought about these changes. Ask anyone who knew me back then. It is truly a miracle that I am who I am today.
The gifts Jesus gives to us not only at Christmas but every second of every day are the ones that can change our lives. They aren't wrapped up in pretty paper and bows, they can't be found on the shelves of a store, and they can't be bought at any price. His love and His mercy are freely given and meant to be shared. This holiday season I hope to think back on where I've been and where I am now and remember to thank God every day for the unending gift of Jesus Christ in my life. He is more than just the reason for the season. He is the reason I am who I am today.